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Journal Journal of Night and Day, Son and Moon

A record of a users' progress or achievements in their particular practice.

Aeternus

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Good luck with your exercises of will.

Will opens the door to success, both brilliant and happy. - Louis Pasteur
 
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Sold a wolf skin necklace and one painting. The deal was twenty bucks for every fifty sold. Sold forty five total tonight. The will exercise proves to be a slight success. I put forth the assertion that someone will buy something tonight.
Out on the streets again, come Monday morning.
Need to rehome Pandora this weekend at the shelter.
Then next week may move back with my parents.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: Apr 28, 2024
DAY: Sunday, day of Sol. YHVH Eloah be Death, Michael, Malachim. Yellow-Gold candles, Frankincense incense.
TIME: 08: 00 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: / F Rained. Precipitation 100% Humidity %. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Things winding to date, Tuesday, that my friend is kicking everything out of her apartment. So Pandora will go to the shelter, and I to Jackson.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
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No rituals have taken place in the last week, and won't be normal for three weeks time.
Donating my Cat to a shelter, trying to stay out of the shelter. Need to get to Parents house Tuesday latest. Then back to California before mid May.
So a few life stressors occurring in real time.
Got called a bum and told to get a job yesterday.
I quit this world. Too many people hate me. It's ridiculous to compete with others due to my disabilities. Still, I will be pretty much ground zero while it occurs. What I'm referring to is the decay of American society.
It makes me wonder, are American poor really rich, or still poor as a door?
I guess it depends on what we definitely be as poor.
Not eating. Sleeping with one eye open.
Not perhaps having prescription coverage for any given month. Not having resources to take public transportation.
Not having resources to help yourself let alone another.
On the brighter side there is freedom in some ways, as long as you're not known by many in the town. Or the world.
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It's been a rough couple of days, the seriousness of it all had hit me like a ton of bricks. I've dealt amongst a lot of eyes on me in the shelter and on the streets.
But it got better this am.
Had breakfast.
Raining so not out selling today.
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Was gifted with tuna for the cat by a pay it forward move, and then Zyn with the five dollars saved. And a dollar back. Or two.
My friend is doing my laundry for me. A ride is lined up within Tuesday to transport Pandie. After that, should transition to my folks place.
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Working on the python GUI program. Watching videos. Reading books. May have to reinvent the wheel programming wise.
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Going to watch on earth and air exercises, for element mastery. How the side reading has fit together. Closing of the Zelator grade. Outline of the Theoricus grade. Side reading and therapy. Perhaps pull a Superman and disappear into a bathroom for a LBRP and or LIRH and solar adorations daily when downtown.
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Going to work on Python Tk for a bit, then onto energy work. Then onto side reading.
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THOUGHTS Sun 4-28-2024 15:40 :
Pleasantly surprised. I have a functional almost GUI box with a title bar, input field to left and button to right. Then for it to calculate and spit out the birth month sun sign. It does exit on error which is nice.
Now to catch the input field value and click on convert to get the sign message.
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Student must study the following books:

  1. The Equinox, Volume I, Nos. 1-10 by Aleister Crowley and others
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    by Aleister Crowley
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    by Aleister Crowley
  4. The Collected Works of Aleister Crowley:
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    ,
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    by Swami Vivekananda
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    or the
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    : Sacred Books of the East XXXIX, XL
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    by Miguel de Molinos
  9. Rituel et Dogme de la Haute Magie by Eliphas Levi, or its translation by A. E. Waite
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    ed. by Aleister Crowley
  11. The Book of the Sacred Magic of Abramelin the Magetrans. by S. L. Mathers
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    by Aleister Crowley

Study of these books will give a thorough grounding in the intellectual side of Their system.

After these, study Liber LXI, Liber LXV and Liber LXVI.
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Starting with the Equinox. These and a couple of Python books, a book on Eight Method and Chi Gung, an Alexander Technique book. This is my evening reading.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: Apr 29, 2024
DAY: Monday, day of Luna. Shaddai El Chai, Gabriel, Kerubim. Silver candles, Jasmine incense.
TIME: 08: 30 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 0% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Things winding to date, Tuesday, that my friend is kicking everything out of her apartment. So Pandora will go to the shelter, and I to Jackson.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:

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Going out to sell papers shortly.
Last day or couple of days with Pandie.
The sun she be down on me. Did morning Solar Adoration, and now I know where East is.
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THOUGHT:
Going to shower and change, then go out to sell papers til 9pm.
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THOUGHT:
Change of plans. Shower and change, hand kitty over to humane society at 4:30, then perhaps sell papers.
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Gave Pandie up for adoption at the humane society intake center. Filled out and signed forms and said goodbye. Both of our hearts were crushed.

Distracted myself from sobbing by doing python programming. Got my latest version working nearly perfect.
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My leg tremors were so bad I couldn't work today.
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Triple Ten and Free CodeCamp are viable outlets.
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Was told by my partner, how to manifest via mudra. Was told I have a yellowish aura.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: Apr 30, 2024
DAY: Tuesday, day of Mars. Elohim Gibor, Khamael, Seraphim. Red candles, Dragons Blood incense.
TIME: 08: 55 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 0% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
About to get up and out to sell papers.

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On the Peoples express bus, to go sell the Peoples free press news. Why the peoples? The USA has fallen. Classes are being downsized across the board. The dollar is worthless. The higher ups haven't felt it yet.
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What should be cultivated in Chaos? Peace.
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Out selling papers, sold my first for the day. Taking a small break.
Deciding on whether or not to whip out laptop and code instead.
On the other hand, would like to sell ten papers today.
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THOUGHTS:
Taken off deal with SkullTraill. Sad but peaceful at the same time. Everybody is a damn grump.
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Abut y change location. A bit on the slow side today.
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*to change location.
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Sold ten papers which was my goal, 26 total made.
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Came home after sales of ten papers, ate, did some cleaning. Smoked down. I leave tomorrow for my folks place, after morning sales.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: May 1, 2024
DAY: Wednesday, day of Mercury. Elohim Tzabaoth, Raphael, Beni Elohim. Orange candles, Lavender incense.
TIME: 13:35 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 0% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
Aside from Solar Adorations, have not done a ritual for ten days now. I guess I'm on Sabbatical.

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Program is not yet finished, but turning it in later today, passing the deadline. At least that small amount of integrity.
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Is sitting here at a friend's place for a couple hours, to transition to folks place, then keeping at "The art of Python programming, in theory and practice".
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Today has been a day of reality, but also a day of healing.
I'm off with family in an hour or two.
From there I will decide next steps
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Been resting and staying home. Less money made, but well rested.
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I think while I'm at my folks place, that I will get some reading and some programming done. And some AT daily implementation. Getting back to daily ritual sooner would be a plus.
 
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Wednesday 5-1-2024 20:07 EST
At folks place post dinner .. watching television. Having an on 8mg cinnamon nicotine pouch, and a cup of coffee.
Will do Zelator Formula and Alexander Technique.
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Retired for the evening. GUI still barely works, while the interpreter works just fine.
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: May 2, 2024
DAY: Thursday, day of Jupiter. El, Tzadkiel, Aralim. Blue candles, Cedar incense.
TIME: 08:42 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 0% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
Did ZF last night and some basic AT stretches. Doing Zelator Formula and AT today.

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Need to shower, shave and change clothes, then get to packing my stuff.
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Keeping at the Python programming in theory and practice. About to transition to my folks place, until I go back to Cali, where an Arduino board awaits me.

Copied code that the interpreter handles fine, and put it in the widget block. It changed behavior slightly, so will continue to hack at it.

Have the Arduino board and electronic parts. :)

Going to go through what I left at my folks place, and get rid of as much as possible.
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It won't be odd to do Alexander Technique at my folks place, as they do PT exercises and stretching and work out with a stair stepper.
They are going to go get a haircut, so Zelator Formula is on.
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Had a blueberry pancake the size of the plate with coffee for breakfast.

Zelator Formula about to be done as soon as folks leave.

Doing Alexander Technique exercises today, and repack clothes.

Book 4/Magick in Theory and Practice as my reading today. After that The Equinox Vol 1.
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Zelator Formula has been completed. Minus Body in Assiah.
Overall performance was great.
The old adage pays true ... Use it or lose it.
Because dualization and overall energy sucked.
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So, with little to do, going through research on the Alexander Technique, work on side reading, and work on Python programming. Maybe do all programs and exercises out of books.
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Since I have no Internet for my laptop, could not get code that I'm working on to SkullTraill in time. I hate being disadvantaged at times..
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On the upside, it gives me less pressure to actually learn the language.
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Learning a bit more about widget/GUI programming in Python. Which is good.

Geomancy, Alchemy, and Qabalah. That is the self assigned side reading.

Had three pieces of pizza for lunch.
Half mile ... 1001 steps on Qubii.

Dinners getting started.
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WEATHER:

75/44, sunny, showers tonight.
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Had two sloppy joes burgers and a handful of chips for dinner.
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Luckily my fellow magician didn't toss out my old diaries. Might do Saints prayers.
May start on angelic conjuration again.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: May 3, 2024
DAY: Friday, day of Venus. YHVH Tzabaoth, Haniel, Elohim. Green candles, Rose incense.
TIME: 07:02 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 50% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much. Sore back.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
Did ZF last night and some basic AT stretches. Doing Zelator Formula and AT today.

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Talking with my folks, apparently I slept soundly, as I missed a lengthy lightning storm.
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Sun
Sun
Taurus
13°36’ Tau
Moon
Moon
Pisces
11°09’ Pis
u_50_5.png
Third Quarter Moon (297°33’)
Mercury
Mercury
Aries
18°30’ Ari
Venus
Venus
Taurus
5°01’ Tau
Mars
Mars
Aries
2°14’ Ari
Jupiter
Jupiter
Taurus
24°43’ Tau
Saturn
Saturn
Pisces
16°51’ Pis
Uranus 22°32’ Tau
Neptune 29°00’ Pis
Pluto 2°06’ Aqu R
Node (M) 14°20’ Ari R
Node (T)15°22’ Ari
Lilith (M) 23°42’ Vir
Chiron 20°50’ Ari
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Perhaps I'm torturing myself, but searched the HVHS to see if Pandie has been put up for adoption yet. It appears she is still in the intake process.
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Venus ... What to do with Venus. Perhaps try glamour spells. Or two cause reconciling with others.
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Or to cause Pandie to be loved by the best owner to be.
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Did 1500 steps on the Qubii this morning.
That's 3/4 of a mile.
Had a sausage egg croissant for breakfast. Had the leftover sloppy Joe minus a bun.
Will shower and do Zelator Formula shortly.
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Had bologna sandwich and some chips for lunch. Python programming adventures continue today. Zelator Formula will get done today. Will finally take my shower before dinner time. Magick side reading will get done.
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And a big FUCK YOU to a certain someone. All you are is passive aggressive toxicity.
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On the brighter side, just relaxing right now. Got a little farther with my program. Still not 100%, but better.
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I don't care to be the person who knows everything. I want to know some things, but it's an expensive question. I'm okay with not being the smartest person. They quit giving away trophies for it a long time ago.
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Had pizza for dinner. Watching Penn and Teller Fool Us.
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Winding down for the night. Will try to remember my dreams tonight.
Last night's dream was my Dad and Stepmom going out somewhere, and my Stepmom was wearing a hoodie shirt of mine.
 
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Got up, had blueberry pancake for breakfast.
Took a nap a few times.
Ate bologna sandwich with chips.
Did Zelator Formula.
Had slight argument with parents.
Took shower and changed.
Had applesauce, corn, scalloped potatoes and pork loin for dinner.
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: May 5, 2024
DAY: Sunday, day of Sol. YHVH Eloah be Daath, Michael, Melekim. Gold candles, Frankincense.
TIME: 11:48 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 100% Humidity 60%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much. Sore back.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
Got up, had cereal and a banana for breakfast with coffee.
Hung out with parents, received a call from a shaman friend who says I have negative entities attached to me, that attacked her in her sleep.
Took a shower and changed into Jeans and T-shirt.
Going out to Red lobster for dinner.
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Went to RL for Lunner, had stuffed flounder with brussel sprouts. Got home after stopping off for three packs of On.
Had a piece of cake, then worked out on elliptical by me for half mile, burning 100 calories.
 
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+++++++++++++++++++++

DATE: May 6, 2024
DAY: Monday, day of Luna. Shaddai El Chai, Gabriel, Kerubim. Silver candles, Jasmine incense.
TIME: 08:54 EST.

PHASE OF MOON: Unknown

WEATHER CONDITIONS: 75/ F Rained. Precipitation 50% Humidity 10%. Wind 0 mph.

EMOTIONS: Numb. Nervous. Sad.

PHYSICAL CONDITION: Awake, feeling fine. Left arm strained and sore. Right arm and shoulder not so much. Sore back.

RITUALS: TBD later today.
BA, RR, TCR, Tarot Card of the Day. Zelator Formula: Adorations, QC, LBRP, QC, LRH Saturn Invoking, Invoking the Four Powers of Earth, MPR, Body in Assiah, Zelator Meditation. Adorations in all four quarters and East and West.

PERFORMANCE: TBD

RESULTS: TBD

MEDITATION: Per advice and Zelator and Neophyte TBD.

SLEEP and DREAMS:
Slept barely. No dreams recalled.

THOUGHTS:
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Did not do yrsterday's Zelator Formula. Will try to do before or after breakfast. Folks have an appointment in the afternoon, so that may get a good time.
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Still hacking away at the Zodiac Calculator. Up to version 12. Added convert function to call from widget function. Still need to bind return key and store entry text into bdate. Running into errors doing this.
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The text version runs fine.
The GUI entry is the main issue being tied to convert button.

So, struggling with Tk and Entry tying to a variable. The interpreter side has worked for over a week. The GUI side not so much. But every day there is progress.
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One more week until my laptop has Internet access again.
 
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Wildchildx11

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Hey, I don't know if this is the appropriate place to post this, but I've been homeless myself.

You can lie, have you called the coordinated entry line for the county? Shelters have been withholding this number here because of shelters being shelters. You're prioritized for housing based on the amount of money that leaving you homeless costs, or vulnerability.

Most counties with a major metropolitian area have a coordinated entry line, call, fill out the VI-SPDAT, say you've been homeless for over a year, there are some tips such as reporting everytime you've walked past a police officer as an episode of police involvement. I reported everytime I took an extra prescribed xanax or Adderall (which I do abuse) as drug abuse for example.

You'll want to score in the range for Permanent Supportive Housing, they won't have any, so you'll receive Rapid Rehousing instead. You're one of those able to maintain it.

What I needed was for more people to acknowledge that the system is actually that broken, your Magick likely isn't working because if you haven't noticed by now, it's kind of designed to keep you trapped. Think outside the box.

I hope it helps, you may have already tried this.

I'm studying to become a social worker to potentially help homeless people and it's another special interest of mine.
 
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Thank you @Wildchildx11 ... Will check on it.

Had scrambled eggs, two sausage patties, and two pieces of toast with coffee for breakfast.

Did some program tweaking.

Did 3002 steps (burned 620 calories) on the elliptical machine.

Took a shower and changed into clean clothes.

Some may think I don't put effort into my journal entries, such as emotions. However, my eighteen year old and twelve year companion, Pandora/Pandie was put up for adoption nearly a week ago. I only hope she receives someone loving with a stable home.

Will do Zelator Formula shortly.
 
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