[Opinion] Name Your Tune! (Your Life Depends On it)

[Xenophon]

Knife crime is a growing problem in the BRD (Bundesrepublik Diversität). Recently the Berlin police suggested victims facing a blade should sing to disorient an attacker. Which invites (not "begs") the question: what song is best to dissuade a Mensch bent on mayhem? Clearly "Ausländer Raus" is a bad choice on all fronts. After hospital, a year's prison for sure. So what indeed to sing? Personally, I'll emend "Panzerlied": "Es braust meine Panthers (shoes) im Sturmwind dahin"---roughly "I'll blow by in my tennis shoes." Then run. My tongue may be sharp; but steel is sharper. Your suggested songs? Especially any magick incantations.

I have a strong suspicion that Berlin's Polizei is honeycombed with crypto-fascists and that this is a ploy to bring back the nigh lost art of galdr, magick songs. Wotan's Runesong sings, "...a third (galdr) I know when need I have to still a foeman's limbs/ I blunt the blade he swings away, the bite of sword and axe..."

 

[stalkinghyena]

police suggested victims facing a blade should sing to disorient an attacker.

As if a scuba diver flailing wildly in front of a shark doesn't just scream "VICTIM HERE!"

In one of the SAS survival manuals it recommends to yell at an attacker "STOP!" and them kick 'em in the balls.
So my song would be "Stop! In the name of love..."

Fortunately I live in RTKBA land. All songs purely instrumental.

 

[HoldAll]

Sometimes your völkische Deutschtümelei is hard to bear, I'm surprised you didn't recommend the Horst-Wessel-Lied (ok, that was mean); I'd rather look up those Chinese characters you like to post instead.

I did some superficial research according to which that particular sage piece of advice had been on the Berlin police's website previously and referred to any sort of threatend violence, not just to knife attacks by evil migrants. Somebody then made a screenshot of it after that recent assault and posted it, thus making the Berlin cops look silly, whereupon they made a lame half-retraction on Twitter and claimed that they were referring exclusively to discouraging potentially aggressive but unarmed hooligans, not to knife or terrorist attacks in any way, and that this ridiculous singing response had been suggested to them by psychologists. Oh well.

I remember reading somewhere that you should scream "Fire!" instead of "Help!" when you're mugged because people are afraid of getting stabbed coming to your assistance but everybody loves watching a fire, so they'll rush to you instead. Human nature...

 

[SkullTraill]

Look kids, lao ye ye shitted on his keyboard again. You need diapers for your mouth. Either pick discussing politics, and post in the politics section or controversy section. Or pick discussing music and post in media/lounge/arts with an appropriate starter post avoiding political discussion.

This thread is low quality bait.