Taking magick more seriously

[Butterfly Affect]

Not like the type of methods or elaborate spells, but the belief towards it. Doubt gives way to anxiety. Making a wrong choice starts to feel more serious.

The spirit is still around me and doesn't talk to me except to encourage me. She's mostly sexual but seems to use it as means of getting me out of bed or off my phone. She influences my emotions a lot. Makes it easier for me to go into a trance. I don't know her name.

I mostly get overwhelmed by the amount of information I read. Left hand path vs right hand path, read this book, no this, no this... The emotional side is what I really don't know. I feel emotions I haven't before. I feel more emotional as opposed to just feeling numb towards certain problems.

I may be ruminating too much.

 

[NightWatchman95]

less is more my friend, the less you try to force a process, the more it unfolds. this is why i prefer to just trust my intuition for this exact reason without getting caught up in "the process". you are making great strides from the looks of things but i do recommend grounding yourself before you burn out.