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- Aug 17, 2023
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I am back. It turns out that my case fell under one of the POTUS-pair's pardons, Biden's or Trump's, after all. That being so, it is time to set the record straight. I hereby depose in open forum, under oath, and on advice of counsel that I dindoo nuffin.
Furthermore, I categorically deny that I spent the whole of the past month in a basement room of the Astral Plane. That I spent said period in company with the shade of one Alastair Crowley, a.k.a., "The Beast." That we, during this time, were significantly occupied in drinking absinthe shooters. Nor were we inhaling any white powders from the blade of a gurkha knife. That either Mr. Crowley or myself was at the same time engaged in "perving out on" any "marathon" showing of Babymetal vidz. (And I would remind the moderators that "looking strongly askance at" a deposing witness falls under the UN definition of "nonverbal microaggression. I further stipulate that the record so reflect.)
Finally, as His Holiness, Pope Francis Mandelgandhi declared ex cathedra in his recent encyclical De rerum forum, "The only hope the Church and God's people have of healing Xenophobia is unconditional Xenophilia." So, if I may and in a spirit of love, let's get a grip (not there, lower down, near the base) and get on with it.
Furthermore, I categorically deny that I spent the whole of the past month in a basement room of the Astral Plane. That I spent said period in company with the shade of one Alastair Crowley, a.k.a., "The Beast." That we, during this time, were significantly occupied in drinking absinthe shooters. Nor were we inhaling any white powders from the blade of a gurkha knife. That either Mr. Crowley or myself was at the same time engaged in "perving out on" any "marathon" showing of Babymetal vidz. (And I would remind the moderators that "looking strongly askance at" a deposing witness falls under the UN definition of "nonverbal microaggression. I further stipulate that the record so reflect.)
Finally, as His Holiness, Pope Francis Mandelgandhi declared ex cathedra in his recent encyclical De rerum forum, "The only hope the Church and God's people have of healing Xenophobia is unconditional Xenophilia." So, if I may and in a spirit of love, let's get a grip (not there, lower down, near the base) and get on with it.
