Journal Journal of Night and Day, Son and Moon

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Yeah, it might do me good to go to a church at some soon point.

At least my focus right now, this day, is on God, and his angels of all choirs and types, loyal and obedient to him.
Then psychotherapy. Might not cut it with only humanist/behavioral, which although I have had some therapy, it was group therapy and therefore didn't get to the root of my issues, it was more like go solve it yourself.

So, yeah. Church and therapy.

As much as I love the Catholic Mass, I feel drawn more to a dual church, a Jewish Temple and I think Episcopalian Church. I met a lady who goes to the temple, and I feel I offended her, so I feel I need to go explain the night and apologize, I didn't realize it was her, and thought it was yet another person trying to give me a hard time, and flipped the direction off. Not good. Especially if she is the wife of the Rabbi?
Not to mention as a Christian, if we follow only the words of Christ until a solid foundation is formed, and true our best to meet it, then atonement is required in this area of faith as well.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Have been sick and experiencing minor seizure aura symptoms, which causes me to have to call off and risk my job as well as 75-150 dollars in wages for the shift. So this is irritating me. Tomorrow it will get resolved.

I came to a personal conclusion on the black magick thing -- 1. There are a tremendous amount of assholes in the LHP community. 2. 50% have delusional romantic and sexual relationships with high ranking arch demons or the emperor of hell. I guess shoot for the moon. 3. I lost, Im a sore loser, and have no desire for sportsmanship. Or did I lose? 4. Some people have no aim in life except to harass and irritate people who have done nothing wrong. Words are not wrong, nor are insults. 5. I've gone batcshit crazy again. Thanks County for not refilling my meds when I needed you to!

So. As for magic. Still trying to stick to Christophers book amidst personal chaos and lack of quality time.

Luckily my roommate-landlord had a change of heart and told me he doesn't care about this month as long as next month is paid within the first week. I have three paychecks, and may have to ask my father or sister for money to be current, so that I can put my plan on an actual working track, and it would help to have optimum health and desire to work. Nonetheless, happy about the change of heart. Thank you Jesus Christ and Tzadkiel and unknown parties!

So, stick to Christophers book, with a few exceptions
1. Im in danger and need to utilize spirits that may or may not help me, all we can do is try.
2. I need to utilize low magic, done through spellwork, sigil/candle magic.
3. I need to utilize low magic for purposes of intent, visualizing, exerting will.
4. Energy Work - as much as I hate Eastern systems, just personal dislike, not being racist, may have to learn a complicated system like Qi Gong or Reiki. People say its easy, but I disagree on grounds of aphasia for one thing.
5. Tarot interpretation -- apparently the Golden Dawn system is too archaic for some, or they cannot make heads or tails out of it, choosing a lesser system and ranking it as truth. Okay, there were readers before the HOGD, and surely will be many after that, same with BOTA and FLO. The reason why, is at one point, we were to color miniature keys aided by a magnifying glass stand or jeweler headsets. Then at some point, you create your own deck. So really, when you create your own deck, you create your own symbolism and interpretation, no matter how right or wrong it may be.
6. Witchcraft/Spellwork/Defensive/Self Protection Magic - Necessary.
7. Qabalistic Magic - Sometimes stuff needs to get done another way.
8. Stick to Christophers book, cover to cover. Then Kraig, then Self Initiation into the Golden Dawn Tradition. By this time I should have enough practical knowledge to combine with the esoteric knowledge. Then utilize The Golden Dawn as a grimoire to test. Then I guess we are at a point where we will either be directed to undertake something, or will do it of our choosing.

Truth of the day: Since I called off due to a second occurrence of seizure symptoms, and still in a questionable mental state, have called off, slept most of the day. Ive really only been up since 3pm. So will do evening battery routine, Adorations, Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram, Middle Pillar. Especially a Middle Pillar. I fell off doing this months ago because of visualization blindness. Even trying to "know it is there if you can't see it" was not true, there was no energy or connection. A binding is still a possibility regarding this. Anyway, back to normal routine starting with evening.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Enjoyed the rain, nice and cool now. Studying kameas. Want to know how to derive any sigil from a kamea or word square. Need to work on clairvoyance from forum suggestions. Roommate gave me a break on rent, I just need to come up with May rent by the first week.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

A Tarot Reading the other night -- "Explain my day/night".
Still labeling titles and astro info on the Rider Waite cards as they come up, whether Majors, Courts or Minors.
Split Hexagram Spread:
XI. XX
IV
XIV
I
III. V
Greater Spiritual Influence: XI -- Justice. Lamed, Ox Goad/whip/instruction, 30. Action, work, equilibrium, balance. Libra.
Lesser Spiritual Influence: XX -- Judgement. Shin, tooth/that which tears apart, 300. Revelation, renewal, rebirth. Fire.
Spiritual Advice: IV -- Emperor. Heh, window, 5. Order, sight, management. Aries.
Unconscious Desires: III -- Empress. Daleth, door, 4. Fertility, creative power, creative imagination. Venus.
Conscious Desires: V -- Hierophant. Vav, nail or that which fastens together, 6. Sound, hearing, wisdom from above. Taurus.
Practical Advice: I -- Magician. Beth, house, 2. Occult wisdom and skill, tact, occult power.
Final Outcome from both advice: XIV. Temperance. Samekh, leg/prop, 60. Equilibrium, transference and purification of energy. Sagittarius.

Top of Deck: IX. Hermit. Yod, hand, 10. Virgo.
Bottom of Deck: II. High Priestess. Gimel, camel, 3. Luna.

Very rarely do we have the Three Wise Men, the Three Magi in attendance (I, V, IX)
XI and XX point to legal or court issues, but of a spiritual nature. There is potential rebirth. Manage affairs and watch (IV).
Hidden desires are fertility related, but religion interference (III, V). Keep on keeping on and aspire to be a great magician(I).
May be a test of energy from above vs energy from below, nephesh/guph, or yechidah.

Of these, the only one labeled was XI. Labeling the rest now per directions.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Middle Pillar done. Got concerned visualization of first sphere of light visualized dropped off, seeing nothing at last two spheres. Other than that felt good.
Tarot Contemplation Ritual - IV Emperor. Order, sight. Aries. Brain.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Monday, 2/25/2022 (2+7+6=15=6, Beauty, reciprocity). Ruling Planet: Luna. Ruling Archangel: Gabriel. Color for day: Silver
Sleep: Still up atm.
Dreams: Will record if any upon waking.
Moon:

Date	Moon Phase (Lunar Phase)	Moon Sign	Chart
April 25, 2022	Waning Crescent	Aquarius	26°50’	( Please, Log in or Register to view URLs content! )

Current Moon is in

Aquarius:

Your relationship with your emotions might be more complicated, because Moon in Aquarius has a strong need for emotional freedom. However, when you are in a group of people, it is easier for you to understand your feelings and free yourself from negative emotions such as fear, anger and jealousy.

Organs influenced by the current

Aquarius Moon Sign:
Organs: Calf, ankle, shin, Achilles, forearm muscles, thyroid hormones.
These organs are now more sensitive so provide them with extra care.

Mood: Medium
Diet: Mac N Cheese and sliced carrots
Exercise: None
Mental Notes: Do the work. Go to work.
Physical Notes: Feet sore.

Adorations:
Liber Resh Vel Helios: Evening done, need to do midnight. Upon waking will do morning.
Lord of the Universe: Upon waking will do morning.

Rituals:
Daily Neophyte Formula
1. The Fourfold Breath
2. The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram
3. The Middle Pillar
4. Neophyte Meditation
Additional Exercises
1. The Four Adorations
2. Daily Tarot Card
3. Silence Exercises
Required Reading
Written Assignments
Projects
Optional Implements
1. The Robe
2. The Lamp
3. The Censer
4. The Book
Daily Zelator Formula
1. The Fourfold Breath (Root Chakra)
2. Ascent into the Cube of Space
3. The Lesser Banishing Ritual ofthe Pentagram
4. The Banishing Ritual of the Hexagram
5. Invoking the Four Powers of Earth
6. The Middle Pillar
7. The Body in Assiah
8. Zelator Meditation
9. Banishing the Four Powers of Earth
10. The Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram
Additional Exercises
1. Daily Tarot Card: Labeling the Minor Arcana
2. GroundingExercises
3. Geomancy
Required Reading
Written Assignments
Projects
1. Enochian Tablet of Earth
2. Tree of Life in Assiah
3. Symbolic Drawing of the Table of Shewbread
4. Symbolic Drawing of the Seven-Branched Candlestick
5. Fylfot Cross
6. Geomancy Stones
Optional Implements
1. The Earth Pantacle
2. The Banishing Dagger
3. The Side Altars

Archangel Invocation:
-GABRIEL INVOCATION-
Monday- Day of the Moon
+ In the Name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen.

Under the authority of SHADDAI EL CHAI, who governeth the sphere of Yesod and Luna, I call upon GABRIEL, Strength of God, trumpeter of Judgement, and Angel of the Annunciation. Form us unto completion through trust and independence as inheritors of the world imperfect. Shape us as reliable agents of the Lord’s grace and glory to assist Mankind in the Great Work of Reintegration.

Archangel Gabriel, I humbly ask of your guidance and to bless my endeavor to connect with the positive energies of Luna. Rid me of idleness, fickleness, and delusion. Inspire me with true initiation through the discovery of personal strengths and weaknesses through introspection and reflection upon inner truths revealed from within.

I submit this request in the name of the sovereignty of the Most High God the Father +, the unending love of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ +, and the illuminating essence of the glorious Spirit Most Holy +. Amen.

Shem Angel of Day:
37th – ANIEL. His attribute is “God of Virtues”. He corresponds to the holy divine name of “God Abda” in the language of the ancient Philosophers. His ray commences from the 181st degree up to the 185th degree inclusive, corresponding to the nineteenth decade and to the angel called Souchoë, under the influence of the Moon. He rules
th th th th th over the following days: 25 April, 6 July, 16 September, 27 November, 7
February. The invocation is done from midday till 12:20pm. The Divine Names are pronounced and the 7th verse of Psalm 79: “Turn us again, O God of hosts, and cause thy face to shine; and we shall be saved” (Deus ad virtutem converte nos: et ostende faciem tuam et salvi erimus)27.
He serves to give victory and to raise the siege of a town. This angel rules over the sciences and the arts; he reveals the secrets of nature and inspires wise philosophers with their meditations. The person born under this influence will acquire celebrity through his talents and his enlightenment, and he will distinguish himself among the wise.
The bad angel rules over perverse spirits; he influences charlatans and all those who excel in the art of misleading men.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Listening to "Stayin Alive" by the Bee Gees reminds me simultaneously of the movies Saturday Night Fever, Foul Play, and Airplane. Particularly the scene in Foul Play between Gold Hawns (?) and Dudley Moore. Daft Punk, however, wins the playlist for the night, Eiffel 65 a close second.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Meditation must become a must. Anti-depressants are a must (depression hampers visualization).
Four books on the desk:
Candle Magic by Rivas
Kaballah, Magic, and the Great Work of Self Transformation by Christopher
The Astrology Book by Lewis
72 Angels of Magick

Trying to figure out the why of the combination of the four, even through Christopher is my primary text right now. Also just realized tonight that most of the neophyte rituals are wired into the Zelator Formula, so will just concern myself with Neophyte for two months, before moving into Zelator, since Ive fallen off the ritual wagon for up to a week or two. Or, shrug it off, and pick back up on the Zelator Formula, which might be a failure point. Cover to cover it is. At least Im a little prepare for grade work transition.
After this and Modern Magick, Will try again with the Golden Dawn material, primarily Regardie. Moving away from this system at some point to try others will be Initiation into Hermetics, The Kybalion, and possibly a Greek magick work, such as Papyri.
After this path, moving toward through knowledge of the grade divination systems, or even now, I may just opt to allow all and create my own reading plan, but I think after this road, it will move to astrology, and astrological, zodiacal, and planetary magic, with full understanding of what Im doing.
Past that, I dont know.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Slept approx 5 hours, got up and did midnight and morning adorations and morning LBRP.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Meditated on the grand seal/talisman from 72 Angels of Magic. Feel much better in some ways. Approx 5 minutes. Saw translucent heads when looking to the southern wall. No details, just beings of light.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Working on ... or about to start on I should say ... kamea squares, seals and sigils for Archangel Samael/Kamauel and Archangel Gabriel.

Though Christ sees us at our worst, there are vey few filthy churches and temples, so perhaps a spring scrubbing and odor neutralizing is in order for the year. Three years with no solid corner to corner cleaning. Again, without furniture, the place looks messy, with furniture such as what I had in the past that was lost, would help order things. Maybe think outside of the box.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Switched picture back to altar, to be a reminder to engage in rituals daily. One simple Novena or spell that relates to magical and mundane goals.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Wards and shields. Learn them, live them, love them.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

My altar after a working with Tzadkiel (yep, only birthday candles, incense and four water cups. Wand au natural as found after a storm. Dollar Tree pumpkin carving knife, not spot on but functional as ritual dagger.

https://imgur.com/a/MNe2WAU

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[DiLoco_DelEted]

My altar after a working with Tzadkiel (yep, only birthday candles, incense and four water cups. Wand au natural as found after a storm. Dollar Tree pumpkin carving knife, not spot on but functional as ritual dagger.

The altar design is based off Anna Rivas Candle Magick book. The two front water cups citrine in color Arte called altar candles or altar cups (water is a gateway to spirit as well as fire/smoke and blood). The left front cup/candle, orange is the Personal Candle/Cup, the Green cup on the right is the Objective. Sandalwood dressed candles and Patchouli were used as perfumes. The teacup with the rock is the fire cup for holding burnt petitions, incense, etc. The triangle of tealights is a water triangle, and in the center an additional blue candle for Tzadkiel.

The altar itself is a wooden chest containing silver silverware, thought it would be a good conductor for spirit. White plastic tablecloth covers the altar itself.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

I was this many years old, when I found in
R. Ambelain – La Kabbale Pratique, 1951. trans. Piers A. Vaughan (2003) (filetypedf)
contains all 72 seals of the Shem angels, presumably channeled or scryed.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

I was this many years old, when I found in
R. Ambelain – La Kabbale Pratique, 1951. trans. Piers A. Vaughan (2003) (filetypedf)
contains all 72 seals of the Shem angels, presumably channeled or scryed.

And now to shower and get dressed and off to work. Dine In Take Out night -- sweet and sour meatballs, chicken potstickers, and a veggie of my choosing, perhaps cayenne broccoli and salt.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Last night I was sitting outside my apartment smoking. And started chatting with a neighbor. We shared our life stories with each other. God as the glue I guess is a way to put it. Also come to find out he's been there a year and is the owner of a nail salon at a local mall I worked right next door to. And this was the first time we met and talked.
What started the conversation was my thought - what can I accomplish 9n a year that will ramp up my confidence and will?

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Home now, and about to do evening and midnight adorations, as well as the Neophyte Formula and possibly the Zelator Formula given time before bed. My next two mornings are precious time, and each of the next two mornings I have some stuff to get done.
Uncanny how cards are drawn, keep in mind after the reading about my day to keep an eye on the Top of Deck and Bottom of Deck, as well as a few other cards. They came up in some order last night.

"Describe my day today"
Split Hexagram Spread

Greater Spiritual Influence: XIX. The Sun. Sol. Regeneration, new generation, material health and happiness. Resh, face which is not a head, 200.
Lesser Spiritual Influence: XII. Hanged Man. Water. Reversal, self sacrifice, illumination. Mem, water, 40.
Spiritual Advice: 0 The Fool. Elemental Air. Folly, mania, extravagance. Aleph, ox, 1.
Unconscious Desires: VIII. Strength. Leo. White queen taming the red lion, kundalini, serpent force, control of Gupta and nephews. Teeth, serpent, 9.
Conscious Desires: XIII. Death. Scorpio. Change, transformation, illness, death. Nun, fish, 50.
Practical Advice: VII. The Chariot. Cancer. Protect thyself, ensure security of self and others. Cheth, fence, enclosure, 8.
Final Outcome: II. The High Priestess. Luna. Law, purity, emotion, subconscious, repetition. Gimel, camel, 3.
Gematria: 302
Reduction: 5, Mediation

Top of Deck: XI. Justice. Libra. Law, justice, balance, equilibrium. Lamed, Ox goad/whip, 30.
Bottom of Deck: XX. Judgement: Elemental Fire. Judgement, revelation, rebirth, renewal. Shin, tooth/that which tears apart, 300.
Final Gematria: 632, Reduction 2, Duplication/repitition.

 

[DiLoco_DelEted]

Per my textbook, now going to label the following keys: XIX, VIII, XIII, VII. The rest have already been drawn and labeled in previous readings.
After that, drawing kamea and seal and sigil of Gabriel/Gsvriel and Samael/Samuel/Camuel.