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Do you think it would be possible to attain a true kind of permanently existing self through vampirism and then branch off into realizing buddha nature so instead of deifying the self the traditional way, one attains immortality then dissolves the self into buddha nature rather than some karmic causes and effects which motivated you to become a certain kind of person so that one can continue experiencing that state of bliss eternally without the problem of impermanence? I've heard that clear light is akin to realizing buddha nature or something very close to it and I question whether or not the attainment of clear light would make the path of a magician significantly easier or more bearable in the face of the obstacles one expects to encounter along the way. Also, might it not make the loneliness of the path no longer painful? I'd like to hear your take on the matter.
You know, I've heard what you're saying about there being no you to experience the bliss but how is it that figures like Padmasabhava and the like seem to still have an individuated consciousness besides having directly realized being a part of all things? Is there not someone there within that energetic field which makes him, him? Also, there are buddhists who have attained clear light through dream yoga and the like but they're clearly not gone or entirely dissolved because they are still alive and with us today. If the experiencer is gone and there is no bliss to be experienced, isn't this somewhat of a contradiction to the existence of a bodhisattva who is said to have realized buddha nature and abides in bliss yet has not exited the wheel of samsara because not all beings have been liberated? I don't think Nirvana is an appropriate goal for me but there are vampiric sorcerers like Alexander W. Dray or people from the temple of set who claim to be able to fend off the astral decay and attain an immortal state beyond which there is no return and no possibility of death. I'm struggling with this idea that one can become immortal and realize buddha nature (since there is no governing authority on how unethical or twisted you can become until you realize buddha nature) and clear light is a state of realization that can't be defiled or altered by anything and is not subject to the laws of karma or cause and effect so it must be a kind of permanent state of bliss. No?
Isn't life grand? This is freedom, and Karma. You may be as you like, and only you suffer the truest consequences.
It may not be what you're looking for, but i enjoy the simplicity of the cosmology given in the RA contacts.
The All is Buddha, all beings are Buddha, all manifestations are fluctuations in the great infinite ocean of Buddha. With that established as the basic understanding, that makes you Buddha, the pure light you were talking about. Now you can just be pure light, hurray, and live happily ever after on a mountaintop, fucking off from society and never changing... or you can decide to be something, the choice is yours. If you take the latter, you have an infinite number of choices, as you said, however the more defined you become, you are likely to polarize either two ways: positively or negatively, in your journey towards becoming the All.
You can become Buddha either through service to all, because all are Buddha and so you use love as a bridge to all, or you become Buddha by self-identifucation and serving primarily yourself, seeing all as fractions of you and connecting yourself to all by power & dominion. Left & right hand paths. Both polarities wind up in a similar place, with neither really objectively being better than the other, it's all personal preference.
What you're talking to would be the negative path, serving only yourself, because you are Buddha, and using all parts of yourself to empower yourself. If you wanna get pop-culture-chic, you could liken it to the Jedi being service to all positive, and the Sith being service to self vampiric negative. From the sounds of it you're gunning for Palpatine, no judgements, you do you.
If you're asking if it's possible, then sure, anything's possible, you're the wizard here, you create your own limits.
Depends on your POV. Mixing paradigms or creating your own seems counterproductive.
From certain Buddhist POVs, there is no self no matter what you do or don’t do. There’s only the appearance of self. What this means can only be learned experientially. Installing a bunch of ideas in the alaya or acting wickedly will only make it more difficult. Not due to some authority, but that’s how cause and effect works.
Do you think it would be possible to attain a true kind of permanently existing self through vampirism and then branch off into realizing buddha nature so instead of deifying the self the traditional way, one attains immortality then dissolves the self into buddha nature rather than some karmic causes and effects which motivated you to become a certain kind of person so that one can continue experiencing that state of bliss eternally without the problem of impermanence? I've heard that clear light is akin to realizing buddha nature or something very close to it and I question whether or not the attainment of clear light would make the path of a magician significantly easier or more bearable in the face of the obstacles one expects to encounter along the way. Also, might it not make the loneliness of the path no longer painful? I'd like to hear your take on the matter.
In some of the Mahayana literature there are accounts of different kinds of beings, including demonic ones, suddenly attaining Buddhahood. Buddhas and bodhisattvas can also manifest as any kind of being. However the whole point of Buddhist teaching of impermanence and non-self is not that a true kind of permanently existing self is undesirable, but that it is impossible. It can't be done. Even the gods eventually wear out and are reborn.
That said, there is also the teaching of Buddha nature and tathagatagarbha, which does seem to posit an abiding eternal substance of some kind. But this is realized only by relinquishing all grasping at self and permanence and as such is only realized by the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas.
So it's kind of paradoxical and confusing and there is debate as to how various terms are to be understood.
As for a vampire becoming enlightened I think a closer analogue would be found in Daoist folklore, where there are nine-tailed fox spirits who have attained immortality and become gods by essentially practicing vampirism.
That said, there is also the teaching of Buddha nature and tathagatagarbha, which does seem to posit an abiding eternal substance of some kind. But this is realized only by relinquishing all grasping at self and permanence and as such is only realized by the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas.
Most Buddhists schools that I'm aware of hold that the tathagatagarbha is ultimately empty with a few exceptions (although I have not heard of it referred to as a substance). Once you posit an eternal, abiding X then it is easy to cling.
This may be a reference to the Five Electricities that in the Hindu tradition are the means by which cosmic life generates substance on all planes.
In that system the human initiate progressively discards substance/energies that are no longer of use, and eventually has a body that mostly behaves as physical but actually comprises the five electricities.
Walking through walls can occur through that mechanism
Isn't life grand? This is freedom, and Karma. You may be as you like, and only you suffer the truest consequences.
It may not be what you're looking for, but i enjoy the simplicity of the cosmology given in the RA contacts.
The All is Buddha, all beings are Buddha, all manifestations are fluctuations in the great infinite ocean of Buddha. With that established as the basic understanding, that makes you Buddha, the pure light you were talking about. Now you can just be pure light, hurray, and live happily ever after on a mountaintop, fucking off from society and never changing... or you can decide to be something, the choice is yours. If you take the latter, you have an infinite number of choices, as you said, however the more defined you become, you are likely to polarize either two ways: positively or negatively, in your journey towards becoming the All.
You can become Buddha either through service to all, because all are Buddha and so you use love as a bridge to all, or you become Buddha by self-identifucation and serving primarily yourself, seeing all as fractions of you and connecting yourself to all by power & dominion. Left & right hand paths. Both polarities wind up in a similar place, with neither really objectively being better than the other, it's all personal preference.
What you're talking to would be the negative path, serving only yourself, because you are Buddha, and using all parts of yourself to empower yourself. If you wanna get pop-culture-chic, you could liken it to the Jedi being service to all positive, and the Sith being service to self vampiric negative. From the sounds of it you're gunning for Palpatine, no judgements, you do you.
If you're asking if it's possible, then sure, anything's possible, you're the wizard here, you create your own limits.
Is it not possible to mix both service and self interest in one’s life? Is there no room for a gray Jedi? An example I could think of is Saint Cyprian working alongside Jesus and demonic entities simultaneously. I would even consider the possibility that one might be able to ally oneself with Jesus as a vampiric sorcerer but I can’t say because I don’t truly know yet. Also, how could I decide truly? Wouldn’t my decision just be a reaction to a previous chain of causes and effects which influenced me to be the kind of person who would do that instead of abiding in bliss on said mountaintop or taken a step further in the astral/inner worlds or even beyond any kind of plane of existence (I assume a Buddha resides in some kind of void where he just sits in lotus position as a body of golden light or something like this without there ever being anything to sway him or make him move at all)? Wouldn’t it just be karmically motivated action to do otherwise? I want a continually existing awareness which feels no pain and is totally blissed out forever but doesn’t stop existing. I have no problem with abandoning personality since it’s really just a karmically influenced process but what I do have a problem with is the cessation of experience and the destruction of awareness.
This is a constant gripe found with the uncertain. No it is not possible to do both and experience the extremes of either. If you want to bring Jesus into this, I refer you to his truth "One cannot serve two masters". If you wish to go to the extremes, a path needs to be committed to, otherwise you will hang around the middle as a moderate, this is just logic.
Solomon used demons as well. It is not the acts but the intentions that determine polarity. You can do dark things in service to the whole, and holy things in service to yourself.
Wouldn’t my decision just be a reaction to a previous chain of causes and effects which influenced me to be the kind of person who would do that instead of abiding in bliss on said mountaintop
No. This is why you reach the mountaintop first as pure radiance. From that state you are liberated from all Karma and may choose your path in freedom and true individuality with no karmic motivations.
The most direct way to do this then is to just go full Buddhist and drop all esoteric vampirism because this would get in the way of your goal as chilling as perfect radiant light.
This seems to be the model of renunciant traditions, like Samkhya or Theravada, that describe cessation in this way. A Mahayana Buddha is often described as infinitely expressive in order to help all sentient beings. A crude metaphor, but we might think of a sentient being as awareness bound or frozen whereas Buddhahood is awareness unbound or fully expanded. You can see that working in one direction undoes the other.
Different tradtions have different maps. One isn't right or wrong IMO, just different. Like dreams. None of them are actually real, but they have different rules.
I would add plenty of tantrikas work with both divine and demonic entities.
This is a constant gripe found with the uncertain. No it is not possible to do both and experience the extremes of either. If you want to bring Jesus into this, I refer you to his truth "One cannot serve two masters". If you wish to go to the extremes, a path needs to be committed to, otherwise you will hang around the middle as a moderate, this is just logic.
Jack Grayle seems to be able to worship two masters. He still works with Jesus using the PGM but devotes himself to Hekate. Jason Miller does the same thing except it's not PGM but instead Jesus is part of his pantheon of deities and both seem to have good results. IMO, the thing about worshipping two masters is Christian propaganda that was thrown around so that people would abandon their pagan deities and devote themselves to the Christian/Catholic pantheon of saints, virgin mary (kosher goddess) and Jesus (kosher pagan deity).
If you're choosing then it's still karmically influenced. You wouldn't choose one thing over an other unless something had previously inclined you towards such thing that you're "choosing" to do. No such thing as free will. What made you into the kind of person that one choose one thing over another? Previous influence or karma. There are only decisions made out of ignorance and understanding. Whether you know or don't know or whether or not you're willing to go the extra mile or not is also something that you had no genuine control over. You read this and you'll probably change the way you go about doing things (maybe aligning with your own best interest) or deny it. I don't know you well enough to determine that but it is predetermined nonetheless. But I do agree with you that it may be in my best interest to see things from the mountaintop before I indulge in something I'll ultimately regret if that state can't be maintained indefinitely. It would be nice if there was a history of this being done before.
The most direct way to do this then is to just go full Buddhist and drop all esoteric vampirism because this would get in the way of your goal as chilling as perfect radiant light.
No because full on buddhist means the destruction of awareness so there would be no radiant light chilling. There would be no experience. There would be absolutely nothing. Full buddhist is self annihilation. I want to attain chilling as radiant light but not self destruction. There is nothing there and it's not some peaceful state. It's literally a state beyond experience so you could never experience it. I'd like to retain consciousness and exist blissed out. Bliss feels good. Non existence doesn't. There's nothing there.
As for a vampire becoming enlightened I think a closer analogue would be found in Daoist folklore, where there are nine-tailed fox spirits who have attained immortality and become gods by essentially practicing vampirism.
Good for Jack, but it isn't propaganda, it's about priorities & focus. You cannot deny that if you focus yourself to one thing wholeheartedly, you achieve more intensity than if your will was bound between several things. Simplifying the problem this way makes the point clear. It doesn't matter where you devote yourself, if you devote yourself fully, you reach more extremes. There will be a point where you cannot serve both yourself and others equally, one will have to come before the other, that's just how reality works, the more power and responsibility you have the clearer this will be.
This is very frustrating, Ladyboi. It's like trying to explain to you a color you haven't had any experience of so you aren't getting my meaning.
Imagine you are a ball of light. Nothing fucks with you, you are completely free and unaffected, even if God himself shot a lightning bolt at you and said "Cease to Be" you would perceiver. No needs, no pain, no time, only infinity and your ability to perceive it. You could just see an incoherent and never repeating stream of experience if you want, or you could remain still and in the dark, it doesn't matter. The point is you're not bound to or touched by anything. You are just Will, a ball of floating will, yeah? How can you karmically be predetermined? You would simply see all things as they are, then, according to your individuality, choose what to do next. You are as untouched and unblemished as a baby born in the vacuum of space, a perfect clean & radiant slate. You are not choosing out of pleasure or pain, morality, vice & virtue, or anything like that because you're just some ball of light. So what is choosing? You have to look and find this yourself, but what is important here is that the choosing is completely free of past karma.
The point of attaining enlightenment is to be free of Karma and make real choices as a real individual, not a karmic-machine. If you cannot conceive of that, then you should add Solar Consciousness onto your to-do list. I understand what you are saying, the iron chain of cause & effect since beginningless time. If you never reach freedom, then yes, free-will is a very faint dim thing, often a delusion, and you would be correct in what you've said. From the box you are in, you are correct.
I see a fundamental misunderstanding of Buddhist philosophy here. I will take this moment to flat out tell you you're wrong, Enlightenment is not the destruction of awareness, you will find in every sutra that awareness hoisted up as all that there is, as the one thing that can never NOT be in this universe of constant change.
If you want to understand Buddhist practice, do not read someone elses interpretation and analysis of it, read the sutras: the Diamond Sutra, the Heart Sutra, the Platform Sutra, the Lotus Sutra, the Latavankatara Sutra, take your pick and you'll find Nirvana, they literally are handbooks on how to cross the Samsaric river in order to get to the other side.
It’s possible to work in the inner library and still be self interested and as long as you remain magically balanced, the doors won’t close on you. I’d argue that you’re more powerful working with a pantheon than a single deity. Certain deities and beings are better and more willing to do certain jobs than others. Certain beings can teach you things others can’t or won’t. If some partnerships fall through, you have others who’d be more than willing to do the job. I don’t put all my eggs in one basket. This is a business, not a playground. I’m not here to have fun. I’m here to achieve a goal and it’s good to have connections. I do work for you I get something in return. Vice versa. You wanna fuck around? We’re not doing business anymore. I’m ultimately doing all this for me even if I’m doing it in service. You wouldn’t want to do it at all if you couldn’t gain something from it whether that be peace, bliss, protection, escape, wisdom/inner knowing, or whatever. We wouldn’t take vows of silence under the threat of curses and severing ties if the things we learned from our intellectually superior subtle allies didn’t treat the wisdom and skills they provide us with as a proprietary currency for our service. I don’t serve myself and others equally. I serve myself above all others but I’m also willing to sacrifice some of my time, energy, etc, in service in order to get something back or sometimes just out of gratitude. Siddartha himself said he doesn’t care whether or not others achieve enlightenment.
Dhammapada (Verse 165): "I will not take consolation in the fact that others have realized or will realize enlightenment."
Majjhima Nikaya (MN 70): "Whether others realize enlightenment or not, I will still strive for my own liberation."
Samyutta Nikaya (SN 22:43): "My concern is not with others' enlightenment, but with my own."
According to your individuality? That would mean you are still the way you are because of previous causes. You would probably do what’s best for you regardless. You would stick around because something makes you want to stick around or you just don’t mind. You wouldn’t mind because of previous influence that would cause you to not mind. Maybe this previous influence is you destroying all craving. Ball of will? Will is just a clever disguise for the ego. There are no decisions made ever. There is no will. There is only cause and effect which leads to power or powerlessness. If you’re aware of the cause and effect you can better leverage this to your advantage. You always do what you think is in your best interest. Nirvana means to blow out like a candle’s flame. It is absolute rest. In such a state there is no you. There is no I and no me. There is literally the absence of all things. Awareness would still count as a thing because it would mean some perception exists.
Here’s what the Wikipedia says about Nirvana: “The nirvana-after-death, also called nirvana-without-substrate, is the complete cessation of everything, including consciousness and rebirth.”
Enlightenment isn’t the destruction of awareness but full on Buddhist does not stop at enlightenment. It stops when all things stop. Enlightenment is more in tune with my goals but nirvana isn’t. I prefer not to merge with the universe, deities, or beings. Even the Ain Sof of the Jews doesn’t compare to the nightmare of nirvana. Moksha seems nicer. At least you still exist on some level.
Having options doesn’t mean freedom.
Solar consciousness? Smells like bullshit. Like seriously dude cmon now. Refer me to an article or something and I’ll read up on it then tell you what I think. I’d also be willing to listen if you told me yourself what exactly you mean by this.
Good for Jack, but it isn't propaganda, it's about priorities & focus. You cannot deny that if you focus yourself to one thing wholeheartedly, you achieve more intensity than if your will was bound between several things. Simplifying the problem this way makes the point clear. It doesn't matter where you devote yourself, if you devote yourself fully, you reach more extremes. There will be a point where you cannot serve both yourself and others equally, one will have to come before the other, that's just how reality works, the more power and responsibility you have the clearer this will be.
This is very frustrating, Ladyboi. It's like trying to explain to you a color you haven't had any experience of so you aren't getting my meaning.
Imagine you are a ball of light. Nothing fucks with you, you are completely free and unaffected, even if God himself shot a lightning bolt at you and said "Cease to Be" you would perceiver. No needs, no pain, no time, only infinity and your ability to perceive it. You could just see an incoherent and never repeating stream of experience if you want, or you could remain still and in the dark, it doesn't matter. The point is you're not bound to or touched by anything. You are just Will, a ball of floating will, yeah? How can you karmically be predetermined? You would simply see all things as they are, then, according to your individuality, choose what to do next. You are as untouched and unblemished as a baby born in the vacuum of space, a perfect clean & radiant slate. You are not choosing out of pleasure or pain, morality, vice & virtue, or anything like that because you're just some ball of light. So what is choosing? You have to look and find this yourself, but what is important here is that the choosing is completely free of past karma.
The point of attaining enlightenment is to be free of Karma and make real choices as a real individual, not a karmic-machine. If you cannot conceive of that, then you should add Solar Consciousness onto your to-do list. I understand what you are saying, the iron chain of cause & effect since beginningless time. If you never reach freedom, then yes, free-will is a very faint dim thing, often a delusion, and you would be correct in what you've said. From the box you are in, you are correct.
I see a fundamental misunderstanding of Buddhist philosophy here. I will take this moment to flat out tell you you're wrong, Enlightenment is not the destruction of awareness, you will find in every sutra that awareness hoisted up as all that there is, as the one thing that can never NOT be in this universe of constant change.
If you want to understand Buddhist practice, do not read someone elses interpretation and analysis of it, read the sutras: the Diamond Sutra, the Heart Sutra, the Platform Sutra, the Lotus Sutra, the Latavankatara Sutra, take your pick and you'll find Nirvana, they literally are handbooks on how to cross the Samsaric river in order to get to the other side.
It’s possible to work in the inner library and still be self interested and as long as you remain magically balanced, the doors won’t close on you. I’d argue that you’re more powerful working with a pantheon than a single deity. Certain deities and beings are better and more willing to do certain jobs than others. Certain beings can teach you things others can’t or won’t. If some partnerships fall through, you have others who’d be more than willing to do the job. I don’t put all my eggs in one basket. This is a business, not a playground. I’m not here to have fun. I’m here to achieve a goal and it’s good to have connections. I do work for you I get something in return. Vice versa. You wanna fuck around? We’re not doing business anymore. I’m ultimately doing all this for me even if I’m doing it in service. You wouldn’t want to do it at all if you couldn’t gain something from it whether that be peace, bliss, protection, escape, wisdom/inner knowing, or whatever. We wouldn’t take vows of silence under the threat of curses and severing ties if the things we learned from our intellectually superior subtle allies didn’t treat the wisdom and skills they provide us with as a proprietary currency for our service. I don’t serve myself and others equally. I serve myself above all others but I’m also willing to sacrifice some of my time, energy, etc, in service in order to get something back. Siddartha himself said he doesn’t care whether or not others achieve enlightenment.
Dhammapada (Verse 165): "I will not take consolation in the fact that others have realized or will realize enlightenment."
Majjhima Nikaya (MN 70): "Whether others realize enlightenment or not, I will still strive for my own liberation."
Samyutta Nikaya (SN 22:43): "My concern is not with others' enlightenment, but with my own."
According to your individuality? That would mean you are still the way you are because of previous causes. You would probably do what’s best for you regardless. You would stick around because something makes you want to stick around or you just don’t mind. You wouldn’t mind because of previous influence that would cause you to not mind. Maybe this previous influence is you destroying all craving. Ball of will? Will is just a clever disguise for the ego. There are no decisions made ever. There is no will. There is only cause and effect which leads to power or powerlessness. If you’re aware of the cause and effect you can better leverage this to your advantage. You always do what you think is in your best interest. Nirvana means to blow out like a candle’s flame. It is absolute rest. In such a state there is no you. There is no I and no me. There is literally the absence of all things. Awareness would still count as a thing because it would mean some perception exists.
Here’s what the Wikipedia says about Nirvana: “The nirvana-after-death, also called nirvana-without-substrate, is the complete cessation of everything, including consciousness and rebirth.”
Enlightenment isn’t the destruction of awareness but full on Buddhist does not stop at enlightenment. It stops when all things stop. Enlightenment is more in tune with my goals but nirvana isn’t. I prefer not to merge with the universe, deities, or beings. Even the Ain Sof of the Jews doesn’t compare to the nightmare of nirvana.
Having options doesn’t mean freedom.
Solar consciousness? Smells like bullshit. Like seriously dude cmon now. Refer me to an article or something and I’ll read up on it then tell you what I think. I’d also be willing to listen if you told me yourself what exactly you mean by this.
Excuse the double post. I'm surprised there's no delete post button but I can't find one and I meant this as a reply but I was typing it as a general comment I think.
I'm more inclined to favor ladyboi's desired outcome: I too don't want complete cessation of consciousness or merging or nirvana. It would be ideal if I could keep my own individuality and consciousness.
This is why I'm a Taoist and not a Buddhist. There are certain things about Buddhism that I just cannot accept.
I'm focusing on the Taoist goal of attaining immortality. Now I just gotta do some more research.
I'm more inclined to favor ladyboi's desired outcome: I too don't want complete cessation of consciousness or merging or nirvana. It would be ideal if I could keep my own individuality and consciousness.
This is why I'm a Taoist and not a Buddhist. There are certain things about Buddhism that I just cannot accept.
I'm focusing on the Taoist goal of attaining immortality. Now I just gotta do some more research.
Excuse the double post. I'm surprised there's no delete post button but I can't find one and I meant this as a reply but I was typing it as a general comment I think.
You can only edit your post within the first five minutes after posting the purpose of which is probably preventing any 'backsies', i.e. retracting/deleting a controversial statement spawning a host of angry replies, with anybody reading it left wondering what all the fuss was all about, so better think twice before posting anything hrtr. I myself write out lengthy posts in a text editing program first, it helps me to think things through instead of making a comment prematurely as well as avoiding typos.
There is no will. There is only cause and effect which leads to power or powerlessness. If you’re aware of the cause and effect you can better leverage this to your advantage.
Except there is will. Our brains are literally machines that perceive correlations and then give meaning to these correlations. Cause and effect? We live in complete chaos. There are infinite causes and effects constantly playing out. Domino and butterfly effects are always at play. At what point can we truly judge the extent of the supposed "cause" and the "effect" it plays.
The Will is how we interpret events. And if you know anything about magic, you know it is all about imposing your own Will to the world, interpreting events with your own perception/ individuality.
If you want to be a slave of path dependence and karma be my guests, but that is just YOUR WILL to interpret how reality works...
What a statement. Is money and power all that matters for you? For what purpose are you seeking those things?
Except there is will. Our brains are literally machines that perceive correlations and then give meaning to these correlations. Cause and effect? We live in complete chaos. There are infinite causes and effects constantly playing out. Domino and butterfly effects are always at play. At what point can we truly judge the extent of the supposed "cause" and the "effect" it plays.
The Will is how we interpret events. And if you know anything about magic, you know it is all about imposing your own Will to the world, interpreting events with your own perception/ individuality.
If you want to be a slave of path dependence and karma be my guests, but that is just YOUR WILL to interpret how reality works...
Is has nothing to do with material money. Currency isn’t limited to man-made paper. I would argue that the man made paper is symbolic for energy. We don’t live in complete chaos. Really, there is no such thing as chaos. It’s all patterns. If there was chaos that wouldn’t mean you’re more free. That just means chaos is molding you. If everything was truly chaos, nothing would exist. Everything that has ever happened is part of a chain of causes and effects that never started and will never end. If it had started at some point that would mean something would have caused it to start and there’s nothing outside of itself that could do that otherwise it would still be a part of the continuous chain of causes and effects. You are a slave to cause and effect. You’re just not looking at it all. You’re seeing it from a limited angle. There’s no way around it. The universe or The All or whatever you want to call it doesn’t care whether or not you accept it. Regardless of whether or not the butterfly or domino effect had been proven right or wrong, you still wouldn’t have a choice over how you came to be the person you are today or who you “decided to become”. Your willingness to change yourself doesn’t mean you have more control over yourself. You forget that circumstances caused you (whether subtle or physical) to want to change in the first place and how far you went with that is subject to previous causes. The idea of being a unique little flower is only true to the extent that you’ve been molded by things differently and further than others have. Now I don’t mean this as an excuse for a victim mentality. Not at all. In fact, I encourage the opposite. Take control and responsibility over your life and develop power. The idea that you could somehow be free or more is just illogical and illusory. Karmic traces aren’t limited to physical phenomena. It’s also mental and internal. The closest you can ever get to freedom is realizing that you aren’t free and you could never be. It’s a logical fallacy. You are responsible for your own consciousness. There’s no mommy or daddy here to save you from yourself. There are no unique perceptions or ways to perceive with your own individuality as you say. There are only distortions of seeing clearly. This can be emotions or thoughts. Your own will is just the will of the universe. Nobody is special or an exception to the rule. Power matters very much and when dealing with beings and people I am firm. I’m not playful. I’m serious and honest, not nice. I expect the same and if I’m not seeing that, I’d rather not work with you. I don't agree with Crowley or his followers on his concept of realization of the true will being the kind of backbone to the magician’s path. The man spends his entire life trying to find meaning in the ultimate meaninglessness of all things and comes to the conclusion that his purpose is helping others discover their purpose. It’s a never ending cycle here. There is no purpose to anything. Whether or not there is purpose, will or uniqueness is ultimately irrelevant to my path so I feel no way about it and I have things to do which will keep me busy while I’m alive. Humans will eventually accept it and I could care less about when it happens. I explain my view for the sake of the argument. To even suggest that there is no purpose to some people seems to be so great of a sin to their own accepted beliefs and ideologies that you immediately become an outsider or enemy. Magical service seems to be the only thing that can somewhat cure this nihilistic view.
To attain gnosis. Not money or physical or social power. Just personal power, magical or sorcerous power, so I have an easier time reaching my goals. I wouldn’t waste my time on a temporary man made currency or a physical establishment/business. That would just become an obstacle. I have no concerns with those things.
